It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
just opened a can of spagetti o's with a butter knife. the things u will do for food when ur stoned.
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
Randomize
