so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
I thought he was foreign, but it turns out when you're that drunk, an Ohio accent just sounds Russian.
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
Randomize
