oh god the rape fog is back!
Dude, this chick just tossed my salad hard. All that I could picture was a dog trying to get the last of the peanut butter out of the jar of Jiff and trying not to think of how grotesque my last dump was.
Then she tried to kiss me and I wouldn't and she got pissed off and went to sleep. Then about an hour later, her kid called her. She went home and on the way out I told her to wash her mouth before she kissed her kid good night. Weird night..
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
Somehow his homemade liquor activated memories of my semester abroad three years ago. I ended up yelling random medical advice in German, while my roommates played dress-up with the cat stoned out of their minds. I consequently gave up on dating. Back in the ONS game.
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
tell me about the eggs
Randomize
