just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
is this the sara with the beer cane?
I woke up with a random mailbox in my room with a note that said "this should probably be returned. Happy Thursday!"
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
Naked Twister starts at high noon
You know what, I don't care that I got too drunk and didn't make it into the boat party. If I had, I probably wouldn't have peed on you later while we soundly slept. I feel you need that in a best friendship.
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
I've been eating like all day, let me suffer my one 'Dear lord, I'm the size of a small whale. One that doesn't even need to find being killed by illegal whaling because I'm not even big enough to provide an decent blubber, but still big enough to be considered for a brief moment.' moment in peace.
If you had asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be right now at 26 years old, I can bet you one million dollars that "tweezing out my nose hairs before I go in to get laser hair removal on my upper lip" would NOT have been the answer
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
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