Dual....:-)
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
I'm pretty sure that when my parents bought me those savings bonds they thought it would go towards something useful like tuition. Not your bail.
I told you I'd buy you lunch.
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
Randomize
