Can I crash on your couch? I just came home to find my wife giving two guys blowjobs.
Two?
Two.
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
Randomize
