If she catches me sniffing the seat of her office chair again, she's either going to fire me or fuck me
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
I'm gonna take a nap by the fireplace and pretend like I know what day it is.
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
Learned two new lessons today: 1) Do not identify pills found in one's car by taking them to see what happens, especially while at work, and 2) There is no logical reason to keep ambien in one's vehicle...
Randomize
