Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
There is a huge fucking spider in my bathroom....I can just burn our apartment down right? What do you need me to grab?
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
Randomize
