remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
There's a mouse. In the house. By the cans. With some pans. Release the cat. To eat his hat. Sorry about the mess. Of my breakfest.
No but seriously, there's a fucking mouse in the house by the beer cans
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
drunk grocery shopping was not as bad of an idea as i thought, this salmon cat food tastes a lot like tuna
Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
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