i don't like sucking hair
I would like to remind you that Mike's hard lemonade only goes good with an extra light cigarette and seminal fluid.
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
where are you?
sonic
Good. I hungoveredly cleaned your room. This is what being married is going to be like. I pick the condoms up off the floor and you bring home the hot dogs.
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
Played "Which Couple Will Take Me Home Tonight" at the bar last night... I can now cross three-some off my bucket list
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
you closed your eyes and pointed to a cupboard..there was vodka on the top shelf. your sixth sense is amazing. plus, we convinced the foreign kid you're a booze whisperer
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
Btw I definitely had pizza sauce on my face, a painful hickey on my neck, and I just remember screaming SISTER WIVES because of the girl's 1997 jean skirt! Wow.
Randomize
