I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
at one point, you reached into your purse, pulled out a tampon, and proceeded to rub it on your lips like chapstick... that drunk
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
Randomize
