shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
I am officially out of liquor stores within a 15 mile radius that don't recognize me as soon as I walk in the door.
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
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