He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
Why is there bacon in the couch?
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
Randomize
