I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?
I understand Curling. That high.
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
you didn't want to pay for the shots so you negotiated with the bartenders. Apparently 1 shot is worth 5 seconds of motor-boating you.
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
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