Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
just realized the sink is the perfect height to piss into never cleaning the toilet again
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
You dont lie about slip and slides
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
Do you know how hard it is to be while you're high with a chuck Norris poster in the bathroom?
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
Hi,\n\nYou left your underwear in my Uber. Thanks and bye.
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
Randomize
