I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?
Twice...
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
Randomize