How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
fact: I now appreciate my drunken winter self even more. I just found $20 in my winter coat with a note that says keep yourself warm next winter. I am awesome.
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
He came home at 2 AM on roller skates with his hair dyed pink while singing "Sweet Transvestite" and throwing glitter on all of us and everything we own. We had to call a cleaning guy.
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
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