ignore voicemail. the cock hath been unblocked.
either way he was missing a nipple.
So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
Randomize