why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
Karaoke machines out. We're taking turns farting into the microphone. Shits going south fast. Definitely be awake when you get home.
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
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