the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
I don't know when it is this year, but if I ever text you an illegible text that also happens to contain sharks, Shark Week started.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
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