We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
i tried to get you to come inside, but you insisted on throwing up in the flowers "because they're pretty."
were you wearing a green and blue thong last night?
yes! wait why?
because i found it in my pocket this morning...
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
i need to put some appletini on your dick
It's time you knew: I have been dating your probation officer for 7 months. Pretty certain he's THE ONE. So, thanks for being a criminal.
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
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