So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
Im covered in vodka and melted gummys. Fuck summer.
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
So there is a 50% chance that he just left my house and a 100% chance that I have to be up for work in 2 hours...
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
Randomize