It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
I'm drunk. And I'm alone. Eating chicken fingers in my underwear. I'd say life is grand.
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
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