I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap.
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
Opened the browser on my phone to a web search for midget birth rates per capita. A good night.
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
Randomize
