I like my sex mixed with concussions.
i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
I just apologized to a wet floor sign i walked into.
Randomize
