If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
saw a pregnant woman in a bridal gown standing on the side of the road while her car was getting searched by police....cheers to new beginnings
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
Randomize
