My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
All of the texts in my phone just say "BEER". I woke up with glowsticks on my arm. What happened last night?
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
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