Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
I swear to god there was like a 2-second timespan in which he went from laughing to coughing, hiccuping, and subsequently projectile vomiting into the grass. There is literally a line in the grass, about 2 yards long, of his puke. It was more impressive than disgusting to be honest. And then he just shrugged and said "I have no idea where that came from."
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
I thought if I bought the most expensive pregnancy test I would look like I had my life together
This couple is walking their pig around campus
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
Randomize
