great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
You called me twice to tell me that you spit in your own eye, when I was right next to you.
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
God and karma are having a fucking field day with my body today.
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
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