i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
We kept trying to bring you to the hospital but you had a tantrum and kept saying you would never be Miss America
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
Randomize
