community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
I just fixed my mom's tv over the phone in 2.17 minutes while high. I'm a fucking professional.
In other news, I just sneezed and almost shit myself. What is happening to my life??
What the hell happened to the sandwich meat I just bought?
After you smoked, you made 8 ham sandwiches.
Guess that explains the mysterious disappearance of the bread...
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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