This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
There was a note in my hello kitty underwear telling me "don't go over 9000"
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
I just want my kids to know I fucked some really hot dudes before their father.
You're going to scar your kids
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
Randomize
