i passed out on the floor in my hallway and woke up with my dog licking himself 2 inches from my face. my first reaction? envy
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
That moment when your mom is so drunk she makes you get out of bed to lay in her bed because she thinks it feels like sleeping on a marshmallow peep....
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
Randomize
