the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
the cool security guard showed me the video clip of how i sat criss-cross-applesauce on the elevator for 20 minutes last night
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
Pretty sure I picked a cat up off the street and took him home with me, fed him tuna, then let him go
Sometimes while peeing I'll go hands free, put my arms up by my chest and make claw hands, and pretend I'm a new type of dinosaur called Dickosaurus Rex.
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
This was the first funeral I've ever attended where I had to pee behind a bush cuz someone was passed-out drunk in the locked bathroom. Steve would have been proud.
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
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