i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
So apparently I’m into choking now
Randomize
