it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
We're using joints as your birthday candles
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
I got outsmarted by a door tonight. Twice.
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
Randomize
