1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
I've never seen the starbucks guy more terrified than when you dove out the car window after your credit card
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
I just got carded by a ten year old.
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
He said I was really mad at him on Friday. Dude I fell asleep in all my clothes and shoes, with my flashlight on, on my phone... I could have been mad at the wall. It wasn't my classiest day.
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
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