i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
I'm laying in the fetal position on the floor of my kitchen eating potato salad with my fingers. Please come over with some real food and keep me company.
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
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