Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
so let's talk penis.
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
Earlier today I was eating cookie dough from a tube, now I'm laying naked next to a hot guy watching Pawn Stars in between orgasms. You really can have it all.
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
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