the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
Randomize