Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
Im blasting "Fat Bottom Girls" as loud as humanely possible in attempts that old ladies doing water aerobics will take the hint and get the fuck out of the pool.
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
Just got a 200 dollar safe, two jars, and a 500 pack of rubber bands.. This doesn't SCREAM drug dealer does it?
...you should fill the cart some more
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
I'm both gender and math confused
Randomize
