he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
Also we decided you're the person whose going to die at my bachelor party...do the math you're the most logical choice
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
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