A girl just told me I should smile because I was surrounded by hot girls. I told her that clearly beauty was in the eye of the beholder. And she slapped me!
Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
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