So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
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