he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
Pooled our money and rented a bouncy castle for the day. Get over here now. Bring vodka.
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
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