I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
who do I fuck, the girl waiting for me upstairs or her roomate making me mac and cheese right now?? This is the single hardest decision I've always wanted to have to make
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
he nicknamed his dick "too big to fail"
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
What shade of lipstick clearly states, I'm only attending this wedding for the drugs and groomsmen?
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
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