i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
Your mom is more observant then Randy Newman.
i just yelled "run, its godzirra!" to an asian kid who looked confused by the tornado alarm test
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
Responsible things to do when you're too hungover to get out of bed: Breast self exam.
Randomize
