she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
Girls should come with a carfax report
best line ever after sex today..."wow, that was a porn-star sized load"
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
we were running to make last call and you stopped me and said very seriously "if i fall, go on without me. just make sure theres a beer in my hand when you go"
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
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