Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
Just talked to the girl you brought home from the bar last night while she was looking for her panties. She said to tell you "nice try".
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
Couldn't see or hear that well because she hit me on the back of the head with a bat. That is my excuse. Also the gin.
these marshmallows taste like mayonnaise. like playing tetris on a gameboy, that's what these marshmallows mean.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
Found plan b box covered with blood. In kitchen sick. Pickle jar is empty. Wtf happened?
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
If I could I'd magically teleport drugs and alcohol to you. Like a bad decision fairy.
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
Randomize
