oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
cab driver says "I saw your friend who opens her legs. she went home with two guys." pretty sure he was talking about you
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
Just so you know there's a random man downstairs knocking on a door with a dozen roses and a 30 pack of beer. Unattractive or not, I'm inviting him in.
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
