Do you know how when animals have surgery they put those cones around their heads so they can't lick their wounds so they can heal? I think someone should invent that for human emotions.
If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize
