Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
His Instagram is like a gay porn blog all of the sudden got conquered by the Mormon missionary that he is
I just did my taxes to sober up, I'm THAT hungover
Randomize
